Suing Their Pants Off

Young Kev called a local law firm and asked, "Is it true they're suing the cigarette companies for causing people to get cancer?"
"Yes, Kevvy, sure is true," responded the lawyer.
"And now someone is suing the fast food restaurants for making them fat and clogging their arteries with all them burgers and fries, is that true, mister lawyer?"
"Sure is Kev"
"And the lady sued McDonald's for millions when he was given the hot coffee that she had ordered?"
"Yep."
"And the football player sued the university when he graduated and still couldn't read?"
"That's right," said the lawyer. "But why are you asking?"
"Cause what I want to know is, I was thinkin', can I sue Bundaberg Rum for all the ugly women I've slept with?"